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hey this is Leo for actualised dot-org and in this video I want to tell you how to stop being a victim alright let's talk about what it means to be a victim in life and how to stop being a victim this is such a critical point and in fact this video is going to be my most important video of all the video that I've shot so far this is going to be the most important and this is actually the fifth time then i'm reshooting this entire video and that's because every time I shoot it even though the video comes out pretty good I need to come out amazing I need to make this point very strongly because I know that this video has the potential to transforms people people's lives the most if they listen to it and that's because so many people are not getting the results they want in life because they are playing the victim and they're not taking responsibility for their life and the way they need to in order to have a foundation from which to do personal development so that's what I want to cover in this video I go into a lot of detail very important detail to build the case for why you are being a victim and why you need to stop doing it and how to stop doing it and how to take control back of your life if you're stuck in your life if you feel like you haven't been getting the results you want if you feel frustrated in any area of your life this is most likely the reason why is because you are behaving like a victim you're thinking like a victim and you don't even realize that you're doing it that's what's so dangerous and crippling about victim mentality I want to help to turn that around for you it's very important because I personally know people people that are close to me people that I've come into contact with they're not going to get anywhere in life if they keep thinking the way they're thinking like a victim thinks so I read a lot of comments in my YouTube video on my YouTube videos because I shot a lot of video already so I have a lot of commons from a lot of people and sometimes I will see people who are really really stuck of a real problem in life maybe they can't get that girl or boy they want for a relationship or maybe they're struggling with their finances or their business or their career or their health or whatever else and you can just read a comment from a victim and it's going to have victim energy soaking all through it and when I read that and I start up to talk with these people try to give them advice or have a debate with them it just becomes more and more than piling on of stories and excuses and rationalizations and blaming and complaining and with this going on they're not able to move forward and take the action necessary to get the results that they really want in their life and the worst thing about it is that they believe that they're really stuck when in fact the only thing that's keeping them stuck is their own thinking and it's a really dangerous thing because it's a self-fulfilling prophecy this victim thinking and that's what we want to end right here right now today what is a victim a victim is somebody who gives away control when we say that you've been victimized or she's been victimized or he's been victimized what do we mean we mean that something happened to that person against his or her will and that he had no control over that situation no ability to respond or react to it it just happened and now he or she has to live with it and suffer through it and there are no options that's the cards that that person was dealt that's what I mean by being a victim the foundation of all personal development is to believe that you have the power and ability to respond and to create any kind of life that you choose and now while this might sound very nice on paper in reality is a challenge it's hard to do it's hard to live and embody this principle if you think that this video is just targeting people who are total victims total pessimists in their own lives then you're mistaken because I can guarantee that if you're frustrated in any area of your life no matter how small the reason that you're frustrated they're the reason you're not getting the results you want there's because you have victims thinking if not across your entire life then in a specific point in a specific narrow area of your life and that is something that needs to be worked out so they open for me now after I've done many years of personal development I don't have a overarching general victim mentality I used to have a lot of that I've worked a lot of that stuff out of my psyche but now I still have victim energy in pinpointed areas in my life and I always have to be on the lookout for those I have to be very careful to find those and to to pull them out by the root and that's what I want to encourage you here to do today so whether you're depressed or you've got anger control problems or you've got major frustrations with your health or your relationships or you're just very pessimistic thinking type of person then this video is for you but if you're just a person who has a pretty decent life but then isn't getting the result he or she wants in one specific area like career or finances or health or relationships or anywhere else then this video is also for you and what I want to do at the end of this video is I'm going to give you a list of signals that a victim will use these are going to be words and phrases that the victim will say to him or herself in order to reinforce their victim thinking and this can be a very powerful tool for identifying victim thinking within yourself and also within others is by just knowing these labels and just knowing that these all of these labels are just playing in and creating more and more self-deception within you so we're going to go into all of that like I said this is the foundation of all personal development because what I'm advocating in this video is a very radical thing what I'm talking about here is taking 100% responsibility for your life 100% and there's a really fundamental question that you have to ask yourself when you sit down and really think about how life works and what you want out of your life when you sit down to try to design your life when you sit down to try to do personal development and here's the question who is ultimately responsible for the quality of your life who is that is that your parents is that your family is that your environment is that the country you grew up in is it your friends is that your co-workers is it your boss is that your husband or your wife or your kids is it that girlfriend or boyfriend that you've got is it your genetics is it the economy is it the political climate that you're living under is it the media is it society is it entertainment is it Hollywood is it the news is it your own genetics is it your own history is that how you were raised what is responsible for the quality of your life see if you answer and but me to this question then you're thinking like a victim and you're going to get the results that a victim gets which are not very good results and you're going to feel the emotions that have that a victim thinks or that a victim feels and those are not very pleasant emotions so what I'm advocating in this video is something very radical and it's going to be something that you're not going to want to accept what I'm advocating here is taking complete utter 100% responsibility for everything in your life that ever happens that means that all these other factors that I just listed off that those are not going to be used as excuses or as justifications or as stories or as any kind of obstacles for you to create the kind of life that you want what does this really mean to take 100 set responsibility I want to really drive this point home there's six areas I think that are very critical for us to take responsibility in and most of us get the first area very easily the first area is success most of us will take responsibility for own successes right how about that promotion that you got of course you get a promotion you're going to take responsibility for it yeah I got that promotion I worked really hard you know I earn that promotion through all the studying and the work that I did that I put into to get that maybe the relationship that you got maybe you work really hard to make that relationship work so you could take some responsibility for that success yeah I worked really hard to to make this friendship work or I work really hard to keep this marriage together so you'll take some responsibility for that and that's good but of course that's the easy right that's the easy thing to take responsibility for what's the hard thing the hard thing to take responsibility for is your failures and that's the next area where you need to take responsibility is your failures what about all in situations where you're not getting the results you want in your life what about that weight that you try to lose but it didn't work that diet you went on that didn't work that gym membership you got that didn't work what about that relationship that was dysfunctional that didn't work what about the lack of money that you're having something's not working there what about the negative thinking that's going on all the time in your head the worrying the anxiety the fears something's not working there see failures and failures happen but what a victim does is a victim will blame others and situations for those failures rather than take responsibility for him or herself so that's the second areas failure the third area is emotions man this one's big I have a video about how to master your emotions which goes into a lot of depth about how to take responsibility specifically just in this one area alone because most people do not get this part right in their life either is that they believe that emotions are caused by the external environment either people will cause emotions or situations will cause emotions so that promotion makes you feel happy or getting fired makes you feel sad or having a breakup makes you feel depressed or somebody saying an insult to you makes you feel angry well in fact you're the one who's generating all those emotions and so you have to start taking responsibility for all the feelings that you have in your life and not be putting those on other people or other circumstances that are out in the real world so that's area number three check out my other video on that which will go into a lot of depth area number four is accidents this is where starts to get a little bit freaky when I say taking herps that responsibility for your life I mean everything I don't just mean the obvious stuff like promotions and getting angry at people and failing at a job or failing in a relationship that's pretty obvious stuff I'm talking also about accidents what is accident mean that means that if you if you go to work and you lock your house but then you come back and you come back that and you find that your house has been burglarized then you're responsible for that even though you locked all your doors that means that if you're sitting there at a red light on your way to work and you're sitting there at a red light just minding your own business waiting for the light to turn green and then someone rear-ends you crashes right in the back of your car out of the blue that you are responsible for that that means that if you invested some money in the stock market and the stock market crashed if the whole economy collapsed you're responsible for that this is a little bit radical and you might say well Leo why would I take responsibility for that kind of stuff I mean that stuff's not in my control is it and I'll get to that in a second but you need to start taking responsibility for even the stuff that is seemingly out of your control because the bottom line here is that what is in your control is how you're responding to the situation in the present moment and we're going to talk a lot more about that in a second the fifth area area number five is circumstances so the circumstances of your life what the circumstances means circumstances means stuff like the family that you grew up in that's a circumstance of life the country that you live in now that's a circumstance of life how about the genetics that you had when you were born that's a circumstance of life how about the money the amount of money that you have now in your bank account or the political system that's empower in your country these are all circumstances and most people really like to use circumstances as reasons for why they can't do what they want in their life why they can't create what they want their life but this is where we nip this in the butt is right here by saying that you take responsibility 100% for all the circumstances to accidents and circumstances and lastly the sixth point is relationships this is a very huge area a lot of people are miserable their lives because of the low quality of relationships that they have whether with friends bosses spouses girlfriends and boyfriends or whoever else family all of that stuff and the reason that's happening is because how much do we like to point the finger at the other person when something's not going right in a relationship almost every time right almost every time we do that and that's a huge problem every single relationship that's making you feel frustrated it's making you feel bad you're completely responsible for that feeling and you're completely responsible for the dynamic that's going on between you and that other person so these are the six areas if you take responsibility for all of these plus anything that's left out by these six areas so anything that's left over you have to take responsibility for that too if you cover all of that then you're going to be good that's going to set the foundation that you need to really do the personal development work that you want to do to create the kind of life that you want to have now if you refuse to take responsibility here then you're going to experience a lot of suffering and bad results what I want to do is I want to I want to show you a a model a model of the possibilities that you have within personal development see I see a lot of people in life what happens is that they're born they go through their early childhood years then they get into their teens they go through school then they get into college and during that time you have a pretty natural upward growth like this in their life an upward growth of progress personal development is just pretty natural then after about twenty-one what tends to happen is that natural growth starts to plateau starts to level out and it plateaus and for a lot of people that Plateau just keeps going and going and going and going for decade after decade after decade until they're dead and that's not even the worst case scenario I see a lot of people what happens with them is not only does it just Plateau but their personal development and their results in life they actually start to decay after 21 so it gets worse worse and worse and worse for me personally my expectation is always at least what I want to have in my life is a linear upward growth like this right from the year that I was born to the year that I'm going to be dead I want it to be like this straight upward slope like that and that's kind of what you would expect life would be like right now you're growing you're no donor and you just keep growing but see that doesn't work out that way for most people because once they get out of school and once they get in the family situation they just kind of become stuck in life because a lot of those mindset saw that conditioning just kind of gels and congeals and basically hardens and then that is the trajectory that then they carry throughout their whole life for me that's a very very sad thing I would hate to live a life like that and I hate to see people and I see a lot of people who live those kinds of lives that are plateaued or are decaying and actually over the last five years if I really think about it then my progress it hasn't just been a linear growth it's been an exponential so exponential growth because every year I'm building up myself with new mindsets new techniques new ways to think about the world going out there taking lots of action generating the results that I want to generate and then those inspire me even more those motivate me even more those empower me literally empower me because I'm creating tools that then allow me to have new capabilities and so what happens is that I get experienced exponential growth and to me that's like oh that's what I want out of life is I want exponential growth it feels so amazing I want that for me now I want that for you guys so let me show you the model this is kind of the model that you could go through if you really wanted to if you really took the personal development of seriously so at this end of the spectrum we've got a spectrum here at this end we've got victims we've also got at this end low consciousness or total unconsciousness at this end of the spectrum we have high consciousness or maximum possible consciousness for you as a human being and then we've got various degrees of consciousness along this spectrum and various stages of life various stages of personal development so I want to cover four stages stage number one is victim victim thinking a victim believes that they don't have much control in life and what the the victim often feels is a sense of frustration and a sense of apathy a victim doesn't even want to start taking action because they believe that they don't have the ability to succeed they believe that there are obstacles and roadblocks that are insurmountable that it's simply impossible and that they can't do it and so this is where they are the problem is that a victim is doing all this unconsciously he doesn't really understand what's going on here he's not even making the choice to be a victim it's being almost made for him by default but nevertheless this choice is being made and is very very crippling and what's most scary about it is that a lot of times people just don't see that they're doing it so if that's lowest possible consciousness then what's one step up from that if you get a little bit more consciousness and you evolve from a victim where do you go you go to stage number two and this is what I call the fighter this is the victim this is the fighter what's the fighter all about the fighter is all about conflict it's conflict energy it's this idea that we live in a dog-eat-dog world the world is harsh reality is harsh I need to fight for my survival I need to fight to protect my family always always needing to fight you need to compete it's believing that life is zero-sum game and that if I win then somebody else has to lose and if somebody else wins then I have to lose and so there's this constant tug-of-war or this constant clashing that's conflict energy you probably know people like this people who are angry a lot people who are combative people who really get in your face people who get get very easily frustrated with life feel like they have to out there and slave themselves in order to succeed slave themselves in order to be happy well that is a fighter and although a lot of this fighting energy this conflict energy can be very nasty very unpleasant especially if you have friends like that or family there like that can be very nasty to be around people like that but it's actually you could make the case it's actually better than being a victim why is this well because the fighter at least the fighter believes that he or she has some control see the victim believed there was no control the fighter believes that there is control but he has to really worked very hard for it and he has to take that control from other people in order so that he could have it so that's the fighter stage and now we move up even further along the consciousness spectrum we move from fighter and we start taking more and more responsibility as we move along this spectrum and once you take quite a bit of responsibility you get to the phase which I like to call Creator the Creator what is the Creator the Creator is someone who realizes that life is what they make of it the Creator someone who realizes that yes even though there are obstacles and challenges in life that every single obstacle has some sort of workaround to it everything that is blocking you in life can be made to either dissolve or it could be made to be coped with to be dealt with to be made at peace with to be happy with so the Creator is all about creating the kind of life that he wants and that's because he's taken more responsibility than the fighter and the victim and the difference between the fighter and the Creator is that the Creator is really focused on putting out right making stuff making stuff with his life making stuff with this business making stuff with this career making stuff with his health whereas the the fighter is always fighting stuff he's always fighting his own health he's fighting his own nature he's fighting people at work he's fighting people in relationships the Creator doesn't believe that fighting and competing is the best way the Creator believes that it's much better to just focus on what you want to create and leave the competition for others if they choose to do it but not engaging it yourself and then there's the final stage this is an advanced stage that very few people ever reach but this should be the aim of personal development for you and in fact this is the vision right this is my vision for you this is what I want you to be shooting for this is why I want you to be watching my videos and to be working on yourself all the time doing the hard work to get here and what is this final stage this final stage I would call it being at peace even better than being a creator is getting here this is maximum consciousness and what happens here is it's very it's very funny it's almost like you go for full circle because when you're at peace you no longer believe actually that you have any control at all that's where it goes full circle just like the victim used to think that he didn't have control well the person that's at peace that is just being an existing he's simply in existence and he is a creative person but he almost believes like he has no control over that creation process it's almost like life force is just flowing through him and doing the stuff that it does and his job is simply to get out of the way remove every single element of resistance within himself to this life force and then life just carries itself out and it rolls very very smoothly it's hard to believe that this is actually even possible this is actually possible life but it is this is possible for every human being it's just that if you're a victim and you're all the way over here or you're a fighter over here it's hard to see all the way to this end hard to see that this could be true but it is true it's just difficult to develop - it takes a lot of inner work it's not something that happens naturally and spontaneously but I want you to be shooting for this but let's not worry too much about this right now because our main objective here is to just get you from the victim to at least the fighter but really the Creator I want you to be a creator in your life so substitute victim energy for creator for creator energy and you're going to be doing really good that's going to set you up to then move on to better and greater things so I mentioned six areas in your life where you should take radical 100 cent responsibility and some of the stuff that I mentioned that probably didn't make a lot of sense to you with stuff like accidents and circumstances of life and maybe relationships too so one thing you might be wondering here is you might say well Leah all this sounds really good in theory but you're telling me to take responsibility for a car accident that I didn't cause you're taking they're telling me to take responsibility for my genetics which I had nothing to do with you're telling me to take responsibility for who my parents were you're telling me to take responsibility for what my name it was was when it was given to me you're telling me to take responsibility for that [ __ ] who insults me or that person in my family was very negative and is abusive towards me what what on earth are you thinking let's make a distinction really clearly right here between responsibility and blaming I'm not trying to get you to blame yourself and to be hyper self-critical and negative about you so the objective here is not to say that you are to blame for your genetics you are to blame for your bad relationships you are to blame for all the abuses and in Justices that you've suffered in your life and all the accidents that are unfortunate what we really mean here instead is we mean responsibility this means how you respond in the present moment see a lot of people especially victims will tend to think well Leo I can't move on because all of this negative stuff that happened to me in the past I had bad relationships at a bad family all sorts of dysfunctions various unfortunate things happen to me how can I get over that and see what you fail to realize there is that problems in the past the pass itself it doesn't actually exist the only way in which it can exist is that exists in the present the past is couched in the present so in order to even be thinking about the past in order for the past to be holding you back you have to be thinking about it in the present moment and that's where you have control because you always have control over your reactions you always have control over how you interpret a situation you always have control over how you want to choose to act despite what has happened to you in the past if you're conscious if you're conscious you have this control you have this this option but see many victims they believe they don't have this option because they can't see it because their unconscious and they don't want to see it they don't want to believe that they have the ability to respond in the present moment however they choose to the situation despite how difficult it is so even though you were abused you can respond to it now in a different way you choose how you can respond if you want you can you can create a whole story about it if you want you can label yourself a victim if you want you could say that you have been served an injustice and then you can go out go about the rest of your life thinking that you can't get better results because of all the stuff that's happened to you that's one option another option is to say I don't want to do that I want to create my life I want to have a happy amazing successful life I want to have an extraordinary life I want to self-actualize I want to grow and I'm not going to let anything that has happened to me in the past hold me back I'm not going to let anything that's happening to me in the present hold me back I'm going to choose the most resourceful interpretations of my circumstances I possibly can and I'm going to take complete responsibility right now for everything I'm going to choose how I react so that if I'm sitting there at a stoplight and someone crashes into me and I had no control about that at least I have now control over how I'm going to think about that car accident I'm going to have control about how I react to that car accident I'm going to have control over my actions going forward and if I was born in a poor country a country that didn't have all the opportunities that some of the first world countries have then I'm going to take responsibility for that and even though I can't go back and change that and even though that is what it is I can respond to it right now I can choose to think about it empowering way right now I can choose to shape my future right now I can choose to move to a different country I can choose to try all sorts of different options to change my circumstances and if I can't change my circumstances stuff then I still ultimately have choice because even the things that I can't control I can control how I think about them how I deal with them I can control how they make me feel by choosing which thoughts I think and so through this process either I will create the circumstances of life that I want or I'm going to fail to do that but I will create the happiness that I want so either way I will win that's how a creator thinks very different than a victim right yeah it's a it can be a 180 degree shift a paradigm shift which is why it's very important for me to talk about all these various details in this video because I want to hit it from different angles because if you're a victim then just telling you one little tidbit of information here - a bit of information there it's not going to do much for you because your brain has gotten really really good with the stories excuses the blaming the complaining the whining it's gotten really good at that and your brain is one of the most amazing mechanisms for creating excuses it's like an excuse creation machine and it will create excuses and stories and justifications for just about anything to keep you from going out of your comfort zone to pursue something bigger and greater your brain will do that so you have to be becoming more conscious about how much self-deception is going on here self-deception self-sabotage manipulation of you by yourself right you almost can't trust yourself it's kind of a paradox of personal development then on the one hand you have to trust yourself a lot to get good results in life but on the other hand you can't trust yourself at all a victim victim cannot trust himself but once you move out a victim to creator and into the peace category then you can trust yourself completely but that's going to take some work for you so right now if you're heavily heavily soaked in victim mentality then you have to be very careful about how you trust yourself even the things that you're saying to yourself as you're watching this video all the little excuses and counter points and counter arguments your brain is coming up with just automatically by listening to me to every point I'm making you're maybe making a counter point in your own head and say oh but Leo what about this oh but Leo what about that that right there is what I'm talking about got to be really careful about that because that's keeping you stuck one thing that's really important to understand is why do victims want to stay victims why do people become victims and get really stuck in that for me it's baffling because when I see it in other people and sometimes I'll go and I'll talk to them I'll try to explain what's going on here but then that person doesn't want to listen in fact usually when you tell a victim that he's being a victim what does he do he doesn't just say oh thank you and then change usually what happens is that that person gets defensive that person gets angry and frustrated with you and then he'll start blaming you for accusing him of all this negative stuff or she'll start saying but you don't understand I actually am a victim you don't know what it's like to be me my life is so miserable my life is so hard all these different excuses and stories are coming up and what's really scary is that these excuses and stories they seem incredibly real they seem very real very tangible almost inevitable in the victim's head right but that's not the case in fact I can think of about four areas in my own life where I've gotten massive results massive personal growth the most personal growth that I've ever gotten and those were all areas where I was a victim for a long time and then what happened is I had some sort of epiphany or realization that I don't have to be a victim anymore and then my results skyrocketed because I made a critical decision to say that no more victim thinking and then as soon as that happened all the bad results I had vanished where did this happen for you in my life one of the places that happened to me is my education when I was going through through high school I wasn't really good academically but then something triggered in me when I was in at the end of ninth grade when I finished my first year of high school where I got really focused on education and in the next three years through high school and through college I just studied really really hard what was really hard on academics and in many ways that have set up a an amazing foundation for me now that I can work from the hard work that I did back then but that didn't happen until I made a very clear decision in my mind that I really want to take control of my education so that's the earliest place where really happened then at the beginning of college the next thing that really happened for me is I don't know if you notice about me but I used to be overweight my whole life since I was a kid I was 65 pounds overweight and I was that way through all of school and early college and then in the middle of college I really had an epiphany there that I could get fit that I could be responsible for my own health I could get that taken care of and that was very challenging for me to accept that line set that I have control over this that I can take full responsibility because I was very much a victim about my way to my health and my eating habits and so when I did that my health completely turned around I lost those 65 pounds at about five months and I was able to keep them off to this day which has been probably about eight nine years now so that was that was a big result for me and another area where this really happened for me is with my career and my work the first job I got it was quote-unquote my dream job the job that I really wanted for me since I was a kid but then I got it and I realized that it wasn't really the job that I wanted I was frustrated and miserable with that job and I was also really angry at the world - I was angry at the world because I had all these amazing ideas I wanted to be a game designer and I was actually working as a game designer and I was working in the studio and I had all these amazing ideas for the games that I wanted to create but then I started getting beer at the world because I saw that to create these games I would need capital and money how many millions of dollars to fund some of these projects and ideas that I had but I didn't have any money I had like five or ten grand in my savings account that's it not enough to do anything and the company I was working at I was barely able to make ends meet so I wasn't saving away any money so I just saw that if I kept going with this company and doing what I'm doing even though it's a great job great opportunities I would never build the capital that I need to build to create these ideas that I have and I thought that I really had amazing ideas and so I started to really become very toxic inside because I had these fancy ideas but I thought the world was not letting me express them and that was become a very problematic and miserable for me it was ruining my relationships at work it made me really impossible for me to work and what I had to do is literally one day I just had to realize that wait a minute I actually have control in this situation all these obstacles with money and opportunity and business problems that I see out there those are there but I can take them on as a challenge I can decide to take it on as a challenge and go out there and work really hard and find that the tough solutions that I don't have right now and that's what I did within a few months then I quit my job start an online marketing business and that business to this day has generated over a million dollars of cash profit just from from that at one point of taking responsibility and I clearly know that if I did not have that decision point and I didn't take responsibility there then I would have I would have stay stuck and I would have continued more and more toxic and miserable and my life instead of having the exponential growth that it's having now it would have plateaued and in fact it would started to decay because that toxicity would be building up inside me and then the final area in my life were I took a lot of responsibility was with dating and relationships I was extremely bad as bad as you could possibly imagine a guy being with attracting women understanding how women work and getting into relationships I was horrible at it and this and it was late in my life I was already 25 26 when I just started to to really take responsibility for this problem and I remember again it was a very specific moment where I took responsibility for the fact that I control my sex life I control how attractive I am to the opposite sex I control what kind of relationships I get in I get to control who I'm gonna be with in the end and when I did that my results with the opposite sex skyrocketed as well did a lot of lot of hard hard hard work to make that happen but but man that was there were that resulted in some of the deepest personal growth that I've ever gotten is by doing that that was extremely challenging for me it was it was harder than losing weight it was harder than studying it was harder than starting a business so these are four areas personally for me I'm sure you have some in your own life you know stuff where you really have to overcome a big challenge a very big obstacle and specifically you have to tell yourself I have to take responsibility now I can take on the challenge see and this leads us to the point that I was making earlier is why do people be become victims and stay victims it happens because it's [ __ ] scary I mean it's scary to admit to yourself that actually you're responsible for all of it why is that scary because that means that you have to now work right a lot of work has to go into you a lot of personal development has to happen that's tough stuff that's not easy people want to stay in a comfort zone they need to start thinking radically different though to start becoming a creator if you're really stuck with a top-off tickle like you don't have enough money to start a business or you're just miserable with opposite sex and relationships or you've got health problems or anything else then the problem is that the current way of thinking that you have going is not going to be enough to get you to where you want to go because you've probably tried it but you keep heading your head against the wall right so what does this mean does this mean that this wall is there and it can't be broken down no it just means that you're you're not capable of it right now given your growth level imagine that you have a rating of your personal growth from a 1 to a 10 now if you're faced with a a level 2 challenge and you're a level 1 human being in terms of development then the challenge is going to be greater than you are so you're not going to be able to surmount it and this will make you think that this is an insurmountable challenge but there are many people who are level 3 or level 4 or level 10 human beings who easily step over this challenge it's not even an obstacle for them at all why is that it's that because the challenge is any different it's that they're different and it's not they were born different is that they develop themselves to a higher level they're more resourceful little more capable they're just more developed this is what I love about personal development is that it's the best tool for overcoming sticky challenges maybe there's a challenge in your life right now you can overcome with your present level of development there are plenty of challenges like that in life so that's great you all overcome those but there's also challenges in your life that are so big you can't overcome them maybe you've got a level 8 challenge and you're a level 2 person that's a very big gap that's not something you're just going to be able to hop over that's something you have to really work on yourself to raise yourself higher and higher and higher until you start to become a little four person level five level six level seven level eight then you get to level nine all the sudden that challenge stops being a challenge but raising yourself on this scale that's not easy work that's really far that's really hard for can work really hard like the amount of work that I had to do to get myself the education that I wanted the exceptional education that I got ridiculous quantities I'm I'm talking about thousands thousands of hours of hard work a lot of emotional labor goes into that most people don't do that the results I got with my with my fitness and my nutrition and losing all my weight ridiculous quantities of emotional labor and challenge went into that I have to be extremely honest with myself extremely brutal had to really not kid myself not [ __ ] myself break down my ego to achieve the results that I achieved and to maintain them to really lock them in that was really challenging to do and that's not something the average person wants to do with my business same exact thing incredible amounts of hard work emotional labor when it's in making that succeed because the only reason succeeded was because I grew myself along with the business and I continue to do that right now and with my relationships oh man that was that was the hardest thing for me the amount of time and energy that I put into that was so ridiculous that most people would not believe what I went through to make that happen it makes me emotional just to think about it because literally I would I would invest thousands of hours doing this studying going out there practicing just to learn how to get that one girlfriend out that I wanted like really hard really massive action goes in here and this is the problem and this is also the solution the problem is that you're not taking enough action if you're a victim if you're a victim in life you need to you need to take massive action and the only way you're going to take massive action is by believing that you can and also cutting out the excuses in the blaming as long as there's excuses and stories there cannot be any action and I'm not talking a little bit of action sure you do a little bit of action know what I'm talking about is massive [ __ ] action massive action see most victims they go out and they try some stuff and then they say but leo I tried that it doesn't work I went to the gym I worked really hard it doesn't work I really I tried meditating you know I'm depressed but I tried meditation and I tried it five times and it doesn't work and you know I don't have a lot of money I went out and I submitted twenty resumes and it didn't work I didn't get a good job I tried really hard at studying you know I'm really bad at math and I'm really bad at this and at that subject I tried studying really hard a couple times and it just doesn't work for me or I really tried to improve my health I try to improve my nutrition but that doesn't work for me either it doesn't work for you because you're not taking massive action and you're going to say leo I took a lot of action no you didn't you think you took a lot of action you didn't actually take a lot of action and you didn't take that action effectively when you take effective massive action almost any obstacle will crumble before you or it will find a workaround but see your brain doesn't actually know how much action is necessary we always underestimate how much action is necessary we always like to think to ourselves because it makes us feel good we like to tell ourselves that we've taken a lot of already massive action when in fact you haven't done that at all that's why it's good to be around really exceptional people that's why it's good to have Mentors that's why it's good to have role models in your life that's why it's good to have people who are way way way better than you because when you see them taking action when you see the way they think when they see it when you see the way that they work how hard they work to achieve the results that they get you start to realize like oh damn like damn like that guys taking massive action I'm a [ __ ] I'm not taking any action at all compared to that guy you've probably had moments like that in your life or you see somebody getting results and you're like huh I wonder why they're getting some such amazing results in this area of their life and then you go and you talk to them a little bit you kind of like duels snooping and then you realize like oh [ __ ] like that guy's taking so much action like the lengths he's going to to get the results he gets or credible incredible like I don't even I don't think I could even do that and you're right you can't do it right now but you can build yourself up and that's what I want for you here I want you to cut out the excuses in the whining and the blaming in the story making and be very honest with yourself really say [ __ ] it to the ego and say you know what [ __ ] the ego I want results in my life I want happiness in my life I only got this one life I got to make it happen and to do that I'm willing to take massive massive massive [ __ ] action on this problem this challenge that I've got I'm going to hit it from every single angle every single direction until I find a solution or I find a way to cope with it to deal with it to be happy with it either way something's going to happen something's going to work for me that's how it creator things do not trust yourself do not trust your brain in telling you that you know how much action is necessary to be good at what you want to be good at in life do not trust your brain to tell you that you're doing enough because I can guarantee you that you're massively under estimating how much needs to be done to be good at things you want to be good at the thing that I want to leave you with here is I want to leave you with a list a list of phrases that victims will use to speak to themselves and to other people this is stuff that I hear in the comment sections under my videos all the time for victims this is stuff that I hear from people who are really stuck in life this is what keeps the stories and excuses in place I want you to really look for which of these you use yourself and in what areas of your life do you use them because when you can start to identify this negative self-talk this victim self-talk you can start to then say okay that's where I'm being a victim and then you can start to say to yourself oh I need to take much more massive action right there much more massive action right here or maybe I need to learn a new technique or new strategy right so it's not just about working hard it's also about working smart you need to work hard and work smart at the same time so here are the labels I can't this is probably the biggest and the worst thing that victims will say them to themselves into other people I can't Leo I can't do that That's not me how can i I can't next it's impossible another another really big one it's impossible that can't be done I can't start a business I can't lose that weight that's not possible some of these things maybe they're possible but this thing right here is not possible next it's too hard next life is unfair Leo isn't the world evil is in the world bad how can we be happy in an evil and bad world next I must I need to I have to believe you don't understand I have to be doing this I must be doing this I need this there's nothing that you need or must or should do in your life all that stuff is up to you but a victim will believe that they have to do stuff it's a big trap next leo I've never done that you're telling me to go out there and do this crazy thing I've never done that you're telling me to go do some public speaking I've never done that you're telling me to go start a business I don't know how to do that I've never done that you're telling me to go start working out and working on my nutrition I don't know how to do that you're telling me to do this personal development stuff you're telling me how to meditate I don't know how to do that I've never done that before well time to learn right that's why you got a brain next but what if I fail Leo what if I start a business and I fail Leo what if I trust that guy in a relationship and he he abuses my trust and I fail in that relationship what if I go to the and I fail what if I meditate and I fail what if I watch your videos and I fail well you know how that goes if at first you don't succeed you try try again that's why massive action is required because there's going to be massive failure next but it's his fault only oh you understand all this stuff is nice but there's just this one guy it's all his fault he's not letting me or this one girl is her fault it's my wife's fault it's my husband's fault it's my girlfriend's fault it's my boyfriend's fault blaming other people remember we talked about this this is a huge huge obstacle for victims another one leo I've already tried that leo I already tried meditation I already tried the diets I already tried the gym I already try starting a business I already tried so many some resumes for better job I already tried public speaking none of that stuff works well massive [ __ ] action take more action and it will work for you you massively overestimate how much you've tried stuff most people they haven't really tried stuff they tried stuff once or twice sometimes you need to try something a hundred times before it works a thousand times before it works you need to have the persistence to do that next never and always victims love to talk like this that'll never happen or this always happens I always get bad luck I always fail I never get any luck I never succeed I never get it easy I never get a break watch for those next I'll try alright Leo I'll get a shot I'll try it out sounds good I'll give a shot I'll try it I'll try to start a business I'll try to lose some weight I'll try to work on my depression all I'll try a little bit of meditation I'll try how far do you think you'll get if you just keep trying stuff how about this one maybe or I think you know I think that could work you know I think I'd like to be passionate about my life I think I like to have a nice wife or husband I oh I think I'd like to lose some weight maybe I'll lose some weight next year maybe I'll set a goal for my business next year maybe a little bit earn a little bit more money next year maybe next I'm not good enough Leo but how am I going to do that build a business I don't know how to build a business study really hard I don't noticed I'm not good at studying relationships I suck at relationships how do you expect me to do all that stuff grow myself do personal development I don't know how to do that I can't do that I'm not smart enough I'm not capable enough I've got some sort of limitation next but Leo there's no point what's the point what's the point of doing all this hard work what's the point of working on yourself growing yourself developing yourself life's so pointless it's all gonna be bad in the end anyways we're all going to dining in anyways what's the point next it's too much effort below I know okay I get what you're saying I get what you're saying you know you got to work really hard to get the results you want but what if I don't want to work that hard you're telling me to take this massive action to improve this area of my life I don't want to do that that's too much work too much work why would I want to work so hard to be happy next leo that's all great for young people but it's too late for me if I saw this video ten years ago maybe it would have done some good if I saw it 20 years ago maybe we're doing some good even if I saw it a year ago maybe we're done some good but now it's too late it's too late to start a business it's too late to lose the weight it's too late to go back to school it's late to be smart it's too late to do personal development it's too late to start meditating it's never too late next surely oh all this sounds great it's easy for you easy for you leo you're doing this professionally you had a head start you had a good childhood you had this you had that I don't have all that stuff I have the following list of disabilities and handicaps and incapabilities how am I going to do it that's why you grow yourself the way that I did because I didn't have all this stuff I worked really [ __ ] hard to get it next but how Leo you're telling me all this stuff and it even sounds good I got really excited about it the other day and I really drew out my goals and all this stuff and I had this big vision for what I want to be and I'm going to accomplish all this amazing stuff I'm gonna have an amazing relationship I'm gonna lose all this weight and I'm gonna have this a ton of money coming in from my business but then I sat down to think about how I might actually do it I don't know how how am I to do it it's not possible how am I gonna do it well that's called doing research you go out there and you look for role models you read books you study you watch more videos you go through a process of trial and error again massive [ __ ] action and then you'll know how and until then you have to trust yourself so that's it I know this is a long video but there's a lot to be said on this topic what I want to leave you here is just with the recap the takeaway from this video is very simple right now all the stories all the excuses all the blaming all the whining all the complaining stops it stops right [ __ ] now you decide to take full responsibility for your life 100% no more blaming of anybody or any other circumstances but but taking full creative authority over your own life because in the end the quality of your life is only determined by you your thoughts and your actions that's it all right this is Leo I'm signing off go ahead post me your comments down below I'd love to hear from you like this video if you would click the like button for me please share it too with a friend the more these videos are liked and spread around the more free content I can keep releasing and finally comment sign up to my newsletter at actualized org it's a free newsletter right here you can go and subscribe you get some nice bonuses but really what is important about subscribing is that you get to stay on track with all the stuff that I'm releasing I'm releasing new videos and content every single week so that you're staying on track with your own personal development this is not something that happens in one day this video may be it hopefully it triggered something in you got you a little bit more motivated more inspired more clear about the way you want to move forward in your life but that's not enough one video is not going to do it you want to stay up to date you want to be constantly growing and this is not something you do as a chore this is something you do because it's exciting I love personal development to me this is the most fun and interesting and passion thing in my life and I wanted to be that way for you because personal development is your life you get to construct whatever kind of life you want if you accept that you're a creator then you want every tool and possible mindset that you can have to create whatever it is that you want to create and I want to help you create everything you want in your life from relationships to business to money to to inner success to happiness to fitness anything there and in between and all around I want to help you do that with the various advanced mindsets that I've discovered in my own journey to understand the stuff because I have to go through a lot of victims thinking to get to where I am now and I still have work to do so I'm working on myself every day and you should be to sign up and that's what you'll be doing you